Tag: Arsenal

I can’t stand this Raphinha guy

UPDATE: He signed for Barcelona lmaoooo. At a club that also just signed 33-year-old Lewandowski, 6 months after they signed 33-year-old Aubameyang, resigned Ousmane Dembele, and couldn’t keep their club legend, Messi, due to financial reasons went on to sign Raphinha for over £55 million. You can’t help but laugh. How many promises can Xavi make for a forward line that going into next season that has Lewandowski, Aubameyang, Ansu Fati, Memphis, Ferran Torres, Ousmane Dembele, and now Raphinha?

Growing up in elementary school, we all had that school crush that we were madly in love with and we all probably had a moment when the person we had a crush on didn’t feel the same way. Absolutely shitty feeling. You know the only thing worse than that? Still going after the same girl or having feelings for her when she already said she didn’t feel the same way. Nothing short of pathetic at that point. This exact scenario is where Arsenal finds themselves in search of the soon-to-be former Leeds RW, Raphinha. Arsenal were at the middle of June, the leader in the race to sign the Brazilian but Chelsea and Barcelona stepped in and messed everything up.

PLAYER PROFILE : Raphinha, is no doubt an absolutely brilliant player, a prototypical left-footed RW who loves taking on defenders and maneuvering himself to get shots/passes with his left-foot. He’s the type of player who hate to play against as he is always looking to go at defenders, and not the fake always where some players will do feint and then pass the ball back if the defender doesn’t budge. Raphinha LOOKS for it and is successful a decent amount of times. There’s a smoothness with his dribbling and movement which kind of reminds me of Di Maria as they have similar body types and are comfortable left-footed dribblers. They do both pick up different positions as Di Maria is probably the more complete player however Raphinha, I’d say is the more direct player.

This directness I’d say is the main reason why clubs like Barcelona, Chelsea and Arsenal are interested in his services, considering the man played two seasons at Leeds with 25 goals to his name at the club, those are more than decent clubs to be linked to.

Raphinha has an absolute wand of a left foot as well. He loves to hug the touchline on the right flank, and then with a quick bit of acceleration, cut in his right foot and deliver crosses to his attachers:

Why did his teammate go and head the ball as if he was defending lmao

The flair and directness of Raphinha in a team at Leeds that had Dan James as a starter make it so obvious why Raphinha stood out so well at Leeds. Like no fucking shit the man was going to look like Robben reincarnated, these men gave up goals like a NYC turnstile, and wondered why they were fighting relegation all season long.

SITUATION: In the spring of 2022, when Leeds was fighting off relegation, it was pretty well known that Raphinha would more than likely leave the club whether they survived or not (they survived). The former Champions League winner with Barcelona, Deco is his agent and was putting out rumors of Barcelona and Raphinha being linked for months now. If that wasn’t fishy enough, it is well known now that Raphinha prefers the move to Barcelona over any English club with Leeds asking for £60million and £65m for the right winger. Like only Raphinha posting an Instagram story pleading for Barcelona to sign him would make it more obvious.

Deco seated with Raphinha on the day he transferred to Leeds from Rennes

Barcelona who are going through their own financial issues (you know, the one where they couldn’t keep Messi, the one where Pique had to take a pay cut, etc.), i.e they are in a shit ton of debt have been in and out of Raphinha depending on what day of the week it is. This waffling from Barcelona caused Arsenal to get in the mix for Raphinha who they have been tracking for some time now. At one point in early June, it seemed like we were the leaders to nab up the talented Brazilian as Barcelona were busy dealing with their own shit.

Arsenal set to make second bid for Leeds star Raphinha with winger ‘open’ to move as Barcelona drop out of race

Then out of fucking nowhere, Chelsea stepped up again as the constant pain in my ass and decided they wanted to ruin my life. This meant they were willing to agree to Leeds demands for Raphinha which Arsenal could not, as well as provide Champions League football to a player that has not experienced that before.

Even though Chelsea thought they had something with Leeds, Raphinha still yearns to play at the Camp Nou, and at this point, it is almost a complete joke with his team for next season still in the air.

KENT’S CONCLUSION: At this point, I just don’t fucking care if Arsenal sign him. I always thought £60 million for a player who only scored 11 goals last year was a bit rich but in this market, it is essentially big teams overspending on players and hoping they work out (Lukaku, Nico Pépé, Sancho etc.). Would I love to have him? Of course I would. But does he take us to the next level? Maybe? Here are the reasons why I don’t care at all anymore about if he comes to Arsenal

  1. We already have Saka: The man is clearly talented and would improve our team for sure, no questions about it. However, £60 million for a player that plays in Saka’s position isn’t the best use of funds. We also have a Nico Pépé sized transfer fee in the RW position that we still have on our books that we haven’t got rid of yet which makes it a little uncomfortable that we would go head first for another RW.
  2. He clearly doesn’t want to be here: Which is totally fine. It’s clear that his preference is Barcelona, Chelsea , and then a long look down to Arsenal. Arsenal have been an utter joke for a good part of the last decade compared to Barcelona and Chelsea, why would any player choose Arsenal over the other two if they had any sort of ambition. Those clubs have had way more success as of late and are playing Champions League football next season, no reason for Raphinha to choose Arsenal for him if money is all relatively the same, absolutely none and it doesn’t hurt my feelings at all.
  3. This situation is all for a Brazilian not named Neymar: Raphinha has every right to take his time on his next club, but for God’s sake, it’s like this guy is the second coming of Neymar. No way is this guy worth the hassle of stringing Barcelona, Chelsea and Arsenal along for £60 million. Neymar, yes he is worth the hassle for a talent like that. This guy, not even close. At this point, I wouldn’t even want the guy, he clearly rather play at Chelsea or Barcelona. Just take the L and move onto somebody else that hates his club situation enough to come play at Arsenal. 🙂

Video credits: SVMM, NBC, Brazil Scout Premium

GABRIEL JESUS COMING TO THE EMIRATES AND SAVING ARSENAL

They did it, they actually went out there and did the damn thing. Fabrizio Romano tweeted on June 26th, 2022 that an agreement has taken place between Manchester City and Arsenal for the services of Gabriel Jesus for a fee £45m.

Despite my initial concerns with Gabriel Jesus actually coming to Arsenal as stated in the previous post below about Gabi Jesus in April 2022, I feel like the driving reasons how they were able to lure the star Brazilian striker was:

  1. Higher wages/ London lifestyle – at the end of the day, I am sure the man is getting compensated way higher compared to what he was earning at Manchester.
  2. The star man – This transfer fully establishes our attack being centered around Gabriel Jesus which would attract anybody if they are the focal point of a soccer team. With that establishment comes a massive amount of pressure and it is Arteta’s and Gabriel Jesus’ job to make sure that faith is fully paid back on the pitch.
  3. Haaland’s arrival to City: I am sure Pep’s conversation with Gabi and his team sort of went like “Have you seen what this Erling Haaland guy looks like? Let’s make this easy on both parties and get this transfer to Arsenal sorted. We get £45m and you get to play at a joke club.” (So bascially City used us to get the better, younger player while our transfer fee substantially pays for that said better, younger player. Gotta respect it.)
Gabi Jesus to save Arsenal?
Continue reading “GABRIEL JESUS COMING TO THE EMIRATES AND SAVING ARSENAL”

Bernardo Silva Regen? The Fábio Vieira post

On June 16th, while Arsenal twitter (myself included) was clamoring for Arsenal to sign Gabriel Jesus, Youri Tielemans, Raphinha, and Lisandro Martinez, literally anyone to revive the squad, these sneaky mofos in the middle of the night came to an agreement with Porto for the transfer of creative Portuguese midfielder Fábio Vieira to Arsenal for €40 million.

Have I heard of him? Nope. Does he have a great hairline? Yep Is that all that really matters in the end? Absolutely

As crazy a fanbase as Arsenal Twitter is, it is unreal business from Arsenal to keep this deal under wraps and out of the public eye. Up until that point, I had watched 0 minutes of Fábio Vieira highlights or matches but I definitively had enough just from reading one tweet to come to the conclusion of him being the best Portuguese in the Premier League coming into next season lmao (includes Cristiano Ronaldo, Bernardo Silva, Diogo Jota, João Cancelo etc.) Without a doubt. As highly touted as Fábio is coming from a Portugal, a player with his profile as a creative left-footed midfielder feels oddly similar to a player we already have in Martin Ødegaard, so what can we expect from him and how will Arteta use him?

Continue reading “Bernardo Silva Regen? The Fábio Vieira post”

MARQUINHOSSSSSS

After a disappointing end to last season, Arsenal has gone out and made the first signing to start the summer transfer window! Arsenal has agreed to sign 19-year-old Brazilian forward Marquinhos from Sao Paolo to a long-term contract. Have I heard of him before? No. Does he fill a particular need? Maybe? After watching a 10 minute Youtube compilation of him, am I ready to delcare his stardom in the Premier League? Hell fucking yeah. Where Arsenal are in our rebuild and with the Europa League next year, I believe it does make sense for us to invest in young talent across Europe and South America if available at the right price and it looks like this is where Marquinhos fills with a reported £3m transfer fee.

Image credits

PLAYER PROFILE: Marquinhos profiles as a left-footed winger who seems to be most comfortable coming in off the right just like the two left-footed RWs we have in the squad now: Pépé and Saka. He is reported to be around 5’7″ which is much shorter than I prefer but he has a stocky and stout build that more than makes up for what he lacks in natural height.

Here you can see him comfortably fighting off defenders by using his body and footwork to escape their grasp. Everytime Marquinhos receives the ball with space to run at defenders, he seems to relish those opportunities to take them to the cleaners which is an attribute that was lacking massively for Arsenal last season. Martinelli and Saka took players on but it came rarely and only if they had momentum on their side to get past players. Marquinhos in the very little I have seen has the acceleration or let’s say desire to get past defenders at a stand-still position which is a skill I admire very much as shown below:

As is common with most successful left-footed RWs, is the ability to wrap their foot around the ball to score goals and the jury is still out there on that to his game. All in all, there is a flair that pops out from the screen when watching him play. He does seem to enjoy luring defenders in for a tackle and poking the ball with his left-boot around defenders. Whether he can get away with that in the Premier League and Europa League, we will see. I haven’t seen much of Marquinhos combining with teammates which is a requirement in a possession-laden Arteta side but I don’t see that being an issue with the technical ability he possesses. The natural fluidity he has allows him to be aware with not only the defenders he is going up against but also his teammates in the flicks and touches he makes to them which is something Ødegaard and Saka enjoyed doing at times.

SQUAD OUTLOOK WITH MARQUINHOS: I will come out and say this before the season starts if Arsenal fails like they always do, IT WILL NOT BE BECAUSE OF MARQUINHOS. Marquinhos is no doubt an investment that Arsenal was willing to take a chance on for the reported £3m fee. There is a very good chance that he even goes off on loan if Arteta does not see space for him in the squad. As someone who loves to loaning off Arsenal players that we could more than use (William Saliba) who knows if Arteta would make the right decision with Marquinhos. Marquinhos is so clearly an Edu signing which means there is going to be a lack of inherent loyalty that Arteta will have towards Marquinhos which will be interesting to see how it plays out. Unfortunately for Marquinhos, his best position at RW is filled with Saka who has that position locked up which means playing time in the league games will come at a premium for the young Brazilian. Pépé is still at the club which is another obstacle that Marquinhos would have to overcome if he can’t play through the middle or off the left flank. I have no expectations for Marquinhos, if he succeeds at the club, great, if not, then our investment in the player makes it to where we aren’t hindered by his lack of production (Nico Pépé). Marquinhos should get enough playing time with the Europa League group stage games as well as the cup games if Arteta lets him stay with the squad.

REST UP NORWICH, TOMORROW IS THE DAY YOU BECOME KINGS

To Norwich City,

Rest up kings, we need you guys tomorrow. Tomorrow is the day you become legends forever. Tomorrow, you do not let Harry Kane or HM Son score a goal. Tomorrow, all Arsenal fans are behind you. Tomorrow, you will give Arsenal fans some sort of happiness because we all know damn well our own team will not do it. WE ARE NORWICH CITY!

Love,

Depressed and inconsoloble Arsenal fan

Featured image credits: Getty Images

Arsenal needed to win today to secure Champions League but instead promptly lost 2-0 to Newcastle because Arsenal

They did it to me again. The one constant in my life, that I can always count on, is for these clowns to let me down, time after time. There is nothing for me to say anymore, I can’t even make “kill myself” jokes anymore watching this team cause I might actually at this point. With 3 games left in the season this is what the standings looked like (on 5/12/2022):

Arsenal had 4 points on Spurs with a win against them last Thursday securing Champions League if they weren’t cowards.

Arsenal had 4 points on Spurs with 3 games left with a victory over them last Thursday being all we needed to secure that 4th place spot. Now you probably know, this is what happened last Thursday against Spurs:

Things I wish Arsenal did today to make me not want to kill myself

Despite me overreacting and panicking after the Spurs defeat, WE WERE STILL GOOD. We had a point over them which meant if we won our next two games, we would qualify for Champions League but nah. After Arsenal doing what they do best which was massively choke against Newcastle where a win would still keep us ahead of Spurs going into the final weekend, this is what the standings look like with one game left:

Just absolutely have to get the bath and toaster ready.

Continue reading “Arsenal needed to win today to secure Champions League but instead promptly lost 2-0 to Newcastle because Arsenal”

Who I’d take from each PL team to join Arsenal?

With the Premier League coming to an end (hopefully a successful one for my sake), the transfer window for next season will subsequently start. With the World Cup taking place at the end of the year, the transfers that take place this summer might play a huge part in if they represent their country for the World Cup. I’ll go through a quick list on who I’d take to come over to play at the Emirates in a hypothetical world where Kroenke’s spent money (It’s a joke, it’s a joke, I know they spent a shit ton these past few summers). It will be one player from each team. Things to consider: Arsenal’s current needs in the squad, if I like them or hate them, have they done anything of note to Spurs, if they are an asshole, decent social media presence etc.

  1. Manchester City: Anybody out of the first rotation 14 of Ederson, Walker, Stones, Laporte, Dias, Cancelo, Rodri, Gundogan, De Bruyne, Silva, Mahrez, Foden, Sterling, Jesus, not Grealish. But… if I had to pick one, it has to be Phil Foden. The kid is only 21 and has solidified himself as one of the best players in the Prem bar none and can play anywhere on the front line.
Continue reading “Who I’d take from each PL team to join Arsenal?”

Arsenal almost blew a two-goal lead to 10 men Leeds

There is nothing like supporting Arsenal Football Club I swear. No team is able to be gifted great opportunities to only almost utterly collapse at the end and ruin everything. Arsenal (2) – Leeds (1). At this point, I keep stressing, results over performances. 3 points are all that matter despite how abject we were today against Leeds.

FIRST HALF: Coming into the match, Leeds found themselves just outside of the relegation zone with any point(s) helping in their cause to stay in the top division in England. We deployed Ramsdale in goal with a newly formed back 4. Cédric took up the right-back position with Holding and Gabriel as our center backs with Ben white still recovering from an injury. Arteta deployed Tomiyasu at left-back over Nuno Tavares which I am assuming was to make sure Raphinha from Leeds was kept in check and he probably didn’t trust Nuno to do as much. Legit before I could get myself settled into the game, Arsenal was gifted the easiest goal we will get all year from the Leeds keeper:

All things being considered, if I was fighting relegation, I would not have let the other team (Arsenal) have such an easy goal, but that’s just me. Arsenal were then able to break the game open the game a few minutes later with Martinelli doing well to get free on the left flank before cutting a cross back to Eddie for the easy finish:

And it just got worse for Leeds when Luke Ayling goes in with two feet on Martinelli with the stupidest tackle you’ll see all weekend to give Arsenal the pleasure of playing against 10-men:

Just the absolute dumbest thing Ayling could have put his team through

Continue reading “Arsenal almost blew a two-goal lead to 10 men Leeds”

We still out here breathing (Arsenal-West Ham reaction)

Results over performances. Results over performances. Results over performances. 3 words to live by at this point of the season. These guys man… 6 points off West Ham this season and Arteta continues to prove me wrong, you love to fucking see it. Two goals form our center backs for a 2-1 victory over West Ham at the Olympic Stadium?!?!? By any means necessary and keeps us on pace with Spurs in the race for Top 4.

At the end of the day, the May 12th game between Arsenal and Spurs will more than likely decide who gets 4th place HOWEVER if Liverpool beats Spurs next weekend, the NLD becomes a game where Arsenal just has to not lose and will also, in turn, assist my blood pressure levels. Don’t get me started on the possibility of catching Chelsea for 3rd place but one scum team at a time. Elneny and Rob Holding were the two standout performers for me on the day. I am still not sure the starting XI that we put out there is one that is fighting for Top 4 but here we are.

Aaron Ramsdale has been holding down the fort despite his recent struggles in the net. Tomiyasu has been fighting calf injuries all season long. Holding is an Arsenal cult hero but has been involved in Arsenal’s recent struggles for the past few seasons. Gabriel is my Brazilian left-footed lover. Nuno is my favorite Portuguese in the world who I love to hate and hate to love. If Elneny gets us to Top 4, I might have to pick up an Egyptian Citizenship. This Granit Xhaka love story at Arsenal would win an Academy Award. Ødegaard might be the best Norwegian player in the world (including Haaland, Im kinda joking but also kinda not). Saka is a starboy. Martinelli never stops running. I won’t say a bad word about Eddie until I see how our season ends.

You love to fucking see it boys, get innnnnnnn.

Featured image credits: Premier League

Video Credits: NBC

Gabi Jesus to save Arsenal?

(Disclaimer: This won’t be a complete Gabi Jesus analysis blog because I’m weary that Gabi Jesus and team are using Arsenal to get a new contract at City)

Reports have come out this past week about Manchester City forward Gabriel Jesus being linked to Arsenal for this upcoming season with discussions apparently continuously ongoing for the past few months according to transfer guru David Ornstein.

Now there are lots of factors that go into this Gabriel Jesus transfer with many of them being speculative. It’s not lost on me that the game right after the news drops about Gabi Jesus being linked to Arsenal that he goes on and scores 4 goals against Watford. Lmao, Gabi Jesus saw the Arsenal rumors break out and was like”Nah fam, I’m too good for Arsenal”. You can’t make this shit up lol.

All that being said, the things are going for Arsenal on making this transfer actually happen:

  1. We need a CF badly – now whether Gabriel Jesus is the CF we need, I am not totally convinced, I am a huge fan of the player actually which I will talk about in a future post but not sure if he is the type of ST we need. Regardless we do need a CF prototype to lead our line.
  2. Haaland coming to City – now if the City front line wasn’t already crowded with stars, this Norwegian behemoth coming to Man City basically pushes Gabriel Jesus out of Pep’s plans for sure. Gabi Jesus is currently finding it hard to get playing time, imagine what it’s like when Haaland comes in to town.
  3. London>Manchester – We are reportedly are willing to offer close to double what he is making now. I am not naive enough to think that City can’t do the same but why would they when Haaland is coming in to the PL as the highest paid player? No reason for City to put that much resources into a player that won’t be more than a squad player for them in the future.

Now here are the reasons why this transfer won’t materialize:


1. We are still Arsenal – until we make the Champions League, we are irrelevant as a club in European and World football. Why would Gabi Jesus take his talents to a shit show in Arsenal in a World Cup year? You could argue the guaranteed playing time would help him to make a crowded Brazilian pool but is it worth it at a club like Arsenal? Time will tell but I wouldn’t blame him if he and his team wasn’t convinced by the direction Arsenal are going in as a club.

2. Using Arsenal as leverage – the recent example of Vlahović using Arsenal as a catapult to his move to Juventus from Fiorentina is a great reason why Gabi Jesus’ team put out the Arsenal rumors. Vlahović used us like the mid-tier club that we are to get Juventus to pay him the money that he wanted. With Gabi Jesus’ contract coming at the end of the 2023 season, it is the time where teams make moves on players, whether to extend or find a transfer to get value out of the player before his contract expires. Arsenal are the perfect club for Jesus to use to get the contract he wants, we are big enough to where it will get dumbasses like me talking, but not enough to where Jesus will actually come.

3. Other suitors – Now despite the possibility of some truth to the Jesus to Arsenal rumors, at the end of the day, Gabi needs to do what is best for his career at the age of 25. At the age of 25, this will probably be the most expensive contract in his career and it needs to be with the right club, competing for the appropriate competitions with his next contract most likely not coming til his age 3o season.

4. I never get what I want – the most important reason why this transfer won’t happen is cause I usually never get what I want as it pertains to transfers or happiness when it comes to Arsenal. I have spent years and years on us missing out on Luis Suarez, Benzema etc, why would this work out any different? Now granted Gabi Jesus is nowhere near the quality of the two examples I named but the point still stands. I actually really do admire the qualities Gabi Jesus possesses and feels that he got a raw deal at City. Pep planned for him to take over from Aguero when Pep arrived at City but Aguero strengthened his grip on the striker position with Jesus unable to influence the Spanish manager. Despite not being a guaranteed starter, I do feel that his output of 93 goals/46 assists in 203 apps are decent numbers for a player that was utilized the way he was at City. Now is he what I had in mind for a striker like Osimhen, Tammy or Darwin, no, but I would be excited at the prospect of him at the Emirates for sure which means this move will not happen.

Featured image credits: PA Images

Video credits: NBC

Exit mobile version
%%footer%%